Thursday, February 26, 2009

Endangered words and creepy girls

Gawker put up this post about endangered words and the scary thing is that I frequently use most of the words people are worried about losing and/or saying should be brought back. Why, just the other day I remarked to a friend, "Zounds! I'm headed to a hootenanny where I shall squeeze my guts with a stick! Then I shall tweet about any terrific frippery I encounter after said gut squeezing." Which begs the question: Am I that person out there in the linguistic forest chained to a big tree? Because no one cares about that person. I mean, you don't want them to get chopped down because that's gross, but in general it's like, "you should have thought about that before chaining yourself to a tree." It also begs the question, does anyone chain themselves to trees or is that just a plot device from Family Ties?

It also begs the question if my references are anachronistic in the extreme so pretend instead of Family Ties I'd said One Tree Hill.

The other day Anna and I were talking and I told her a story where I'd worried I'd come off as a creepy goober and she stopped me and said nothing I could have done would be worse than having used the word goober. "But I like goober!" I weedled asthmatically. It was attractive. She relented a bit, perhaps I am more in touch with slang zeitgeist was the thinking, however I've since embargoed goober.

Goober, goober, goober, goober, goober, goober, goober, goober, goober, goober, goober, goober...

Oops, embargo repealed!

So, want to hear the story where I was worried I came off as a creepy goober? I think you do!

I had potential plans to hang out with someone I don't know well however we're both incredibly famous and exceedingly wonderful. He invited me to a thing and I couldn't go to the thing so then maybe we were going to meet up the following day. He texted, "I'll touch base with you tomorrow." I quickly typed into my phone: "Not if I touch your base first." And, here is the thing, I was sitting there staring at my own text thinking, "Don't send this, it's sending a message you aren't intending to send." And then I watched myself hit send, knowing this was quite possibly going to make things weird, because ultimately I was more in love with my dumb wordplay than anything else. Hence the question which I discussed with The 404, can girls be creepy?


Brett Jones said...

Outside of the realm of Fatal Attraction, no. Girls don't do creepy. Even the various degrees of the Fatal Attraction thing isn't creepy it falls into the psycho category.

You're reply could have been worse though. You could have tossed out a third base innuendo and made your next face to face meeting really awkward. Unless you're interested in the fella, then it could have been seen as playful.

Advanced Prototype 2.0 said...

I hate linguistics.

I know of some people who chain themselves to lightning rods.

Creepy? I'd have to agree with Brett. It's more psychotic or disturbing. Like the "Back the fuck up," "Calm the hell down," or "Get off my jock" kind. Although back during senior year of high school after I gave my speech at graduation, a friend of mine who I wasn't really close with approached me afterwards and personally gave me a one-page letter she had wrote confessing her secret feelings for me. Then when she signed it at the bottom, she also gave it a big kiss, so there was a big, red, lip print. We had only been in one class together and that was it. After reading it, I didn't find it creepy, but more like, "Where the hell did this come from?" I was just baffled. Although I didn't consider her psycho. Well, let's just say it was awkward, much like how you feel about your text message? I don't know. Fuck it.

Toddrod said...

When is "flirty" suddenly "creepy?" Unless you don't think he wants you to be flirty!?! Non-sense, every guy wants a woman to flirt with him. Even I wish my boss would flirt with me. I'd let her sexually harass me, too. That is only because it wouldn't seem like sexual harassment because I'd like it. Perhaps Brett is right. There is no creepy for women (unless they are kinda ugly).


JaysonB said...

Clingy is the female counterpart to a guy's creepy.

However, this is entirely dependent on how attractive he finds you. Whereas a guy that you might be attracted to can easily come off as creepy, a man will willingly interpret initial clinginess as she-wants-to-do-me-ness if he gets the vapors at the sight of you.

Dude's tend to ignore, even embrace, a female's insanity if he thinks he's gonna get the goods.

(When I first started reading about the endangered words I was all interested, and then when you had to note that hootenanny was one of them, I cringed. I use it on a nearly daily basis.)

warren the turd said...

First of all girls can be creepy..i don't see how "falls into the psyco category" gives them a pass on creepy.creepy case in point..a couple of yrs ago my sister and I were living with a women in her house,She was smart,seemed normal enough,working on her masters in psychiatry(should have been a clue)One day she called my sister at work and said she wanted to move her bedroom..from the third to the first floor(???) so my sister said she didn't mind if it was that important.When my sister came home she said not only did she move her bedroom but everything she moved was in the exsact same position and place as before just two floors down.I mean in detail to where her hair brush was on her nightstand in the same corner of the room..needless to say things got "creepier" after and we both far as the "word" thing goes I thought it was kind of weird that you and dustin said you don't listen to words in songs?I really hope you were just trying
to be funny.Oh and least I forget.. a couple of your loyal fans myself included apologized to you the other blog and professed our love for you and your sensitive soul and you turned around and called us "internet bunions" HOW CALLUS!(even though it was funny)Oh,and Your my world and I love you more than the air i breath.Ok?

JaysonB said...


That is not creepy.
That is batshit insane.

Pedantry said...

It's strange that in Gawker's complaint about the word "tweet", he misspells "bleating".

warren the turd said...

Jason B,
So batshit insane CREPPY that everytime I hear "boris the spider"
by the Who ..i have to take a shower.oh yeah Alison are the sun I revolve around.

Trapp said...

You wouldn't think that the subject of words would bring about such interesting responses.

Perhaps it's true that men tend to lean more toward the creepy, and women, toward the psycho, in relationships. Creepy is never good. Psycho might seem good at first, because it seems flattering to have someone so dedicated to you, that is, until you've lived with it for a while, and then you realize that it's actually really creepy.

Speaking of endangered words, I think Warren meant "lest" instead of least. I would protest losing the word "lest".

Next thing, they'll get rid of, "BEHOLD!" All the words that I bellow in over-dramatic fashion, when I want to sound like a raving lunatic.

I do not approve.

WFG said...

A cousin of mine recently called me a goober on facebook.

JaysonB said...

Weird. Recently I called a cousin of mine a goober on facebook.

alison said...

I love you guys! Also, to answer our Turd friend, I DO listen to lyrics in songs if I like the song enough to want to figure out what the lyrics are. I was just joking in the vlog.

Ted, White and Blue said...

I was talking to a not-so-creepy girl on the phone today and I used the word "tutiledge" [sic!?!?] and she said, "I've never heard anyone use that word in a sentence!" Top that shit Gawker!