Wednesday, February 20, 2008

Career highlight ahead

I'm going to be contributing to three shows on the Soap Opera Network. Soap Opera Channel? I forget, but given Tobey's affinity for All My Children, you can imagine how exciting this is! Also, I'm manning one half of the debate column in Page Six Magazine this Sunday so be sure to pick it up if you're in the city or nearby environs. I'll be squaring off with (squaring off against? how exactly does one "square"?) another notorious commentator—whose last name is my first name—and there will be little tiny pictures of both of us. Tiny pictures!

Finally, four people have looked at me like I'm insane tonight because of my insistence that it's common knowledge, at least on television, that if you receive a suspicious package you put it in the shower. Does anyone know what I'm talking about? Yes, okay yes, fine, my understanding of this is largely informed by the episode of Facts of Life where Tootie is obsessed with Jermaine Jackson but I'm pretty sure this can't be the only place I've encountered it. Thoughts?

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

Quote of the day:


"That package was actaully meant for your neighbor, but its okay, I was gonna send you one anyway....."


-Ted "I wonder if he knows what HD stands for " Kaczynski

Joe said...

For a while now I've suspected that Tobey was the puppet-master behind your career, Alison, pulling the strings as he sees fit. Fortunately, instead of taking 10% of your income, he's satisfied with a bowl of Alpo, a squeeze toy and an occasional belly tickle.

I remember seeing a TV show once where a strange package was put in a bathtub full of water. It was so long ago I don't even remember what show it was. But how do you know water won't set it off??

These days it seems like bomb disposal teams try to safely detonate a bomb rather than try to stop it from exploding. But if you MUST defuse a bomb, I know for a fact you always cut the RED wire first! Or was it green...

Anonymous said...

You said debate. heh heh, Man, I need to grow up. Anyhoo, I think when you square off it's like square dancing maybe? I think it's neat you'll be doing a soap opera channel thingie. It'll bring me out of my protest of it due to them changing the airing of Dallas from 10am central time to 3am central time. That was a crime against humanity. But I have an open mind. I wasn't aware of the package in the shower thingie, but that will cause me to implement a new policy for just in case I get a mysterious package. heh heh I said package. STOP IT!

Here's a little fun fact. I turned the channel to B.E.T. a few minutes ago and they are showing Different Strokes. heh heh heh, OKAY ENOUGH ALREADY, It's the one where Arnold throws the water bomb off the terrace. That's not the good part. The good part is, this is an episode that has Miss Garrett in it. And of course I thought of you Alison. Just one of those neat things I always enjoy. And that raises a question. Do they have The Facts of Life series on D.V.D? If so, does Alison own it?

Michael.
La.

Anonymous said...

What's that Alison? You're not sure if they have The Facts of Life on DVD, and you're not sure if you own it? Oh,okay. That's cool. I was just wondering. I'm only teasing, the majority of my questions are rhetorical.

I gotta say, Big Brother is really letting me down this season. The things that they think are "drama" falls very low on my "drama" scale. I've never understood why some people think that knowing information about someone who volunteered the information is somehow making them more powerful. It's down right ridiculous. It comes on again tonight. This new scheduling of the show I don't like. But, this show usually comes on in the summer. So again, I'll take the good with the bad. I need a nap.

Michael.
La.

Joe said...

Let's hope the kids on the Facts of Life end up better than the ones on Different Strokes.

Maybe Fox will launch a new weekly show with the two Alisons where they discuss the entertainment industry. By discuss I mean argue, bicker, yell, pull hair, tear off clothing...

OK, maybe not. But a show like that would be pretty awesome. Or so I like to imagine...

Anonymous said...

I noticed they are doing a thing right now on Red Eye where you write in ideas or whatever. I would do that, but as you can tell I'm very shy. So I'll just list a few here if I were to write in.

1) Show a segment of Red Eye bloopers. You know, like things that didn't make air. Or maybe a behind the scenes of what takes place before the show is taped.

2) Take the idea from the Seinfeld show where they did a whole show backwards. For example: Start off with Andy doing the Post-Game wrap up, then go backwards from there. In my mind I think that would be pretty cool. You would really have to tune-in to understand.

3) Have Bill or someone have on a shirt or hat or somethihng like that where they have to keep that blur image on it the whole time. It doesn't have to really be anything profane on the shirt or hat, but it would seem like it. Or maybe even blur out someone's face.

Yes, those are kinda silly, but at least it's an idea.

Also yes, I have too much time on my hands.

Michael.
La.

Anonymous said...

Here's a neat story. I like to listen to music from my television. Not MTV or anything, but actual music channels. I mostly listen to the rap (uncensored channel), but I also like the 90's channel as well. But that's not the point of the story. I like to let my birds out during the day so they can stretch their wings and hang out. Whenever I put on the rap channel. Jack (the male bird) will start whistling like there is no tomorrow. He really enjoys listening to the music. I like to mess with him a little bit though and put it on the country channel for a minute, and he immediately shuts up. It's just kinda cute. Jack has a ghetto pass. He's so hood!

Truth be known? I'm actually procrastinating right now because it's scrub the toilet/shower day and I'm avoiding it as much as possible. It's also need to clean their cage day. But don't let me fool you. I'm not one of those people that does thing be a schedule. I do things as needed and more importantly, whenever I feel the mood should strike me.

Michael.
La.

Anonymous said...

I'm on break right now. I thought I would take a gander at PageSix.com. It was a great site. What I wasn't expecting was when I saw a thingie to click on about Lindsey Lohan's nude photo shoot, I was expecting to read a great article about it. Which it was, but I got to see Lindsey's boobies. And of course being a man I was only interested in reading the article. I read some of the replies or whatever it's called and all I could think to myself was HATERS IN THE HOUSE. Seriously though, I thought it was a great site. I'm gonna go back and gaze over it some more. JUST FOR THE ARITICLES PEOPLE!

Michael.
La.

Anonymous said...

Okay, just read the Greg-a-logue. I'm still lol'n. The Matt Lauer comment was brilliant. The not putting as much effort into getting crank during college was funny as well. That reminds me of my college yrs, When we would just go to the book store and get a can of Keyboard cleaner or what the kids call these days Duster, and/or wippetts. That's how we passed the time between classes. Plus, we were all poor and it was affordable. Now kids, I'm not advocating doing this. Don't do drugs, Drugs are bad MMm'kay!!!

Michael.
La.

This post is rated NC-17.

Anonymous said...

Michael's Diary entry:

Dear Diary:

I had a pretty good day today. I opened up a new box of Rice Krispies with a toy inside. It was a watch, but it won't even come close to fitting me. I'm gonna re-gift it for Christmas. Other things I've done is clean out the bird cage. I had other things to do, but I see no reason in taxing myself. I did some blogging today with the lovely Miss Alison and the lovely Mrs. Wendy. Those gals crack me up. Hmmm, I talked to a few friends on the phone and did some text msg. Now I'm going to slip into my evening routine of watching my shows and having a strong opinion about every little ole thing just to make me feel better. (That's not entirely true.)
I hope to tomorrow is just as good as this one. I didn't even have to use my A.K., I gotta say it was a good day.

Michael.
La.

credits: Ice Cube

Ted from Accounting said...

Let me see, I don't get the Biography Channel, Soap Opera Network or Page Six, so that sucks! I currently spend about $50 a month on HD PPV fights but I can't give that luxury up for those channels...so please keep posting your works!

I hope the other Alison is not whom I'm thinking of! That would actually be brilliant if it is but wow I couldn't imagine you two squaring off after my Red Eye melee post. That could get crazy!

Regarding Red Eye, I've been catching up on episodes and I got to say that Kira was great the other day, I can't stand that Michelle, and Noelle was pretty good!