Friday, January 04, 2008

The irony!

So I have this free SAT Question of the Day 2008 desk calendar because someone at work didn't want it and I like to keep my mind agile and nimble like a high school sophomore. Or maybe junior? All I remember from the test is that the guy in front of me had dreadlocks and they smelled. Anyway, so I have this calendar which should go on the list of things where I think "ooh, that'll be fun!" and they really aren't* except this one has been not that unfun so far. The irony though? I can answer the questions but I can't figure out how to get the calendar to stand upright on my desk like it's supposed to.

*the ultimate "ooh that'll be fun" idea that wasn't at all fun and the realization of its lack of fun was all but immediate? my sister and I were standing on a subway platform waiting forever and I said "hey, I have a fun idea! let's look through our cell phone phone books and remember how we met each person!"

Oh and I'll be doing another movie segment on Red Eye tonight!


Anonymous said...

What a quandry you're in Ali.
(heh heh heh, I said urine.) As I was saying, I recall having that same feeling of the Rubix Cube. I thought I would be the smartest guy in the world if I could master it. Unfortunately, I just peeled all the stickers off and placed them where needed to complete the puzzle. To me, I thought I was a genius because I thought outside the box, so to speak.

I think it's great you're gonna be on The Eye tonight. I haven't seen it since your last time on a Saturday or two ago. Started having withdrawls. Have a great show, and remember, no uncontrolled laughter, or freezing up. (Just jackin' witcha.)


Anonymous said...

Friday's Quote:

" Is the movie segment you'll be doing on be about the real life story of Letterman's Santa-like Beard ?"

-Jack N. Hoff, Idaho

Anonymous said...

I don't know it you already got your info together for your show tonight, but I hope that you get to talk about the *spoof.* movie. I don't recall the name. It's similar to the 300 movie? That's a must see for me. Although I never go to the movies cause I'm sort of a germ-a-phobe. Nothing intense, I'm just aware, I'm just aware. Doesn't repeating yourself make you look cool?

Well, I got another intro I just made up this instant, so I will share.

Ali: if Natural beauty and a gorgeous smile were a teather ball, I would repeatedly hit her until I got her wrapped completely around my pole. Without an opponent, cause I don't like to share. Ha!! That one's not bad, not my best, but pretty good nonetheless. I have one about a sp**m bank, but no way does that pass the lithmus test. I'm practicing on of my New Year's resolutions, the art of refraining.

p.s. I really just wrote alot of words, but I really didn't say a whole lot.

P.s.s A word I would like to use in a sentence today, but most likely won't be given the opportunity is: Flabbergasted! Kinda like Pee Wee Hermans word of the day. If I hear it, I'm gonna yell.

Anonymous said...

Damn Ali, you're quick on the draw today. That was posted like immediately. You must be speed reading.


Ted from Accounting said...

As Ted from accounting was driving around delivering pizzas yesterday...Don't you just love someone who talks in the 3rd person...makes you think Ted from accounting is just a pen name. Hmmmm

Anyway, as Ted tried his best to deliver within 30 minutes, he thought, damn, I should have worn thicker Drakkar while taking the SAT test and why hasn't Alison been on Red Eye lately! Oh goody goody! I can't wait! Your secret blogger "shout out" signal tonight will be to cross your eyes while on camera!

Anonymous said...

Welp, another tangent here. I can't seem to get this song out of my head today. I've heard it a couple times the past few days. It's from Snoop Dogg, *Sensual Seduction.* It's such a silly song, but if you hear it, I can almost quarantee you'll get stuck on it too. I've even tried to replace it with *O.P.P*, but my mind can't be tricked today. Now, I got to go take a nap, so I can be stoked for the show tonight. Kinda weird for a Louisianian to say stoked.

Michael. []D [] []V[] []D

P.s I've only smoked half a cigarette today. That's amazing, Yeahh me!!!!!!!!!

Anonymous said...

Oh yeah, since you're here Ted. Can you tell me who won the Chuck Lidell fight last weekend? I can't seem to find out who won.


Anonymous said...

I know, I said I was going to go take a nap, but I guess I lied. I just went to the TheDailyGut, because I like to read the Greg-a-logues, and see who the guests are. Anyway, Anyway, tonight's greg-a-logue is funny as hell. One of his best ones in my opinion. If you get a chance, you should go check it out. Now I'm gonna go hybernate.

Michael. is an unpaid actor who endorses Red Eye.

Ted from Accounting said...


That fight was the bomb! The Iceman nearly knocked out the Axe Murderer but ultimately won by decision. Chuck is back baby! I went to UFC 76 in Anaheim a few months ago and saw him lose his 2nd in a row but now I anticipate if he gets one more victory then he will get another title shot late 2008. If only I could sport a Mohawk like him and be cool. For some reason, my mullet and undersized "Journey" concert t-shirt doesn't intimidate people.

Alison - Ok, that secret cross-eyed signal will be similar to your new profile picture but the right eye needs to angle to the left. If you pull this off, I will screen capture it and post it for you! >)

I seriously have to get some work done now...Your blog is like crack! You people are ruining my chances of getting the drive-though manager position! Can't you just feel the excitement on "Alison Appearance" days! LOL

Gary said...

Always look forward to your Red Eye appearances. Maybe you could guest host for a week next time Greg is on vacation.

The Letterman beard is disturbing. Kind of looks like Sasaam Husseins missing twin. He did have one.

Go to to see the proof.

So has Tobey called since you left for NY? Is he still eating his tobeys?

Anonymous said...

So much for that nap. I watched an Amy Winehouse video, and now I'm all worked up. She's unusual, but yet I can't look away. It's like I can't form an opinion about her. I find myself repulsed and yet attracted all at the same time. I can't really explain it. So enough of this.

Thanks for the info. Ted. I was hoping he won. I'm just not so sure he can beat Rampage Jackson. I hope he does but, it's gonna be tough.

Speaking about words that annoy me. Has anyone noticed the new phenomenon of people saying "right?" after every sentence. This may not be new, but it is to me. I can't explain it, but I really want to slap the s**t out of somebody if they say it around me. (Not that I would, I don't do violence.) but that's just how irritated I am about it.

Now I got some housework to do.

Michael. (air traffic control person.) not literally, use your imagination.
La. Home of Tim McGraw.

P.S. Ali, are you sure that wasn't Adam Duritz from the Counting Crows sitting in front of you?

spaceagent said...

Hi Alison!

Just wanted to let you know how much I enjoyed seeing you on Red Eye this morning. You always add so much to the show. I love it when you're on.

So funny... the intro Greg used for you was from a post of mine on The Daily Gut yesterday. Ha!

This morning I was watching some videos online, and one of them was another by Jackson Browne - "Somebody's Baby" and it made me think of you.

Here's the link:

I've always loved that song. It brings back a lot of great memories.

Have a great weekend!!

Anonymous said...

Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "The irony!":

I also wanted to add that at the first page of your blog, your new picture looks like you're keeping watch over your blog. It's genius. It's comparable to the Mona Lisa. Maybe that's a stretch, but we'll just go with it.

My word I would like to use today, but probably won't happen is: enthralled.

Michael. "big baller."

Anonymous said...

Hey Ali, Just wanted to say I enjoyed you on the show last night. I thought that was a nice top you had on. Green is definately your color in my opinion. I know I say this alot, but I'll say it again, you have the most beautiful smile. I also thought that you were funny when speaking about the movies. The best part was when you discussed prequels and sequels. It was laugh out loud funny. Well, enjoy your day and weekend. I'll be watching football all day. toodaloo!

La. I thought it was cool that Louisiana was talked about. Even though it was about the Spears' family. I pray Britney gets her life back in order. We love her down here.

Ted from Accounting said...

Ted’s Post Game Wrap (Just keeping it real):

1. Damn you talk fast some times!

2. I almost saw the secret signal…but then I realized you were just puffing up your lower lip…like you wanted to kick someone’s ass (probably mine)!

3. It’s apparent that Greg is enthralled with you!

4. I think Bill and Andy are afraid of you…It’s like your that person who doesn’t have the powerful position but everyone knows you have power

5. Please tell Bill to stop doing those Bill-a-Busters…OMG those are stupid!

6. I realize your punk / goth background but lighter colors really do look good on you.

7. Did you steal the titanic necklace? I thought you mumbled “I’m the king of the world” at one point!

8. Besides those worthless impressions of mine…I forgot to express how great you did! Keep it up kid…your going places! Oh, if we are stuck in an elevator together, I will let you use my shirt!

Anonymous said...

I got a new song stuck in my head today. Somehow though it's not a nuisance (don't know if I spelled that right.) It's "Steal my Sunshine." from Len. Circa late 90ish, perhaps later than that. Isn't that weird? I happen to think it's very interesting. Such a catchy tune, and yet applicable.

Michael Eric. (that's my middle name.) Debonaire' isn't it?

Ted from Accounting said...

To follow up on my Bill-a-Buster the event he looks at your blog: I think Bill is very funny, however, that isn't his type of comedy. Now, you could pull off more of the short intellectual type humor. Instead of the Bill-a-Buster you could drop the A-Bomb on the Greg-ologue. Unfortunately, that would make you full-time on the show and then they would pull a Rachel Marsden on you...Never mind I mentioned any of this! Let's continue to let Bill flop like a fish out of water.

Let me digress...I'm so loving this Guitar Hero 3. I thought it looked so goofy at those store demos but when you actually play it on a big screen with surround sound, it's really fun. I have a totally new respect for professional guitarists now!

bradleyejones said...

Gorgeous and hilarious as ever, you take over the show when you are on!