Anna and I got it on in the backseat of a car!

Okay fine, by "it" I just mean the camera. We turned a camera on in the backseat of the car after Red Eye. What a cheap tease that was. Anyway, look! A video featuring Anna and me! Yay! Also, I was looking at Anna's blog and do you guys want your own tags? Is that what I'm hearing? Is that the dealio? Is that the scuttlebutt? The news? The 411? The word on the street? The story? The guff? The, uh, er... I'm running out of terms... I feel like there are some funny ones I'm missing. Crap! Tags?

sleep, movies, narcissism

Sometimes I'm just sitting there and a brilliant idea will come to me. I'm sure you know how it is. Just kidding, I'm sure you don't, but I didn't want to alienate you. It's cool, we can pretend we're on the same level.

Anyway, earlier I was just sitting there thinking that I feel really sleepy and that I really haven't felt AWAKE in months which is weird and what's that about and then I was thinking that if I were to make a commercial for a sleeping pill I would make the slogan... ok here it comes... get ready...

To sleep... perchance to sleep?

It's probably been done already.

Unrelated, I once received a promotional lavender filled sleep mask-shaped pillow thing (when you work at a magazine you receive all sorts of weird stuff) and it said "Goodnight wrinkles" on it. I think it was promoting a dermatologist or eye cream or something so it made sense that as a music critic, I received it. Anyway, I remember my sister was holding it and put it on her eyes and as she was doing so said "Goodnight wrinkles... see you in the morning!" It still cracks me up.

Last night said sister and I saw I Love You, Man! which I could see again right this minute. I recommend it highly. It was cute and sweet and silly and smart and silly and cute and sweet. Am I repeating myself myself?

Also, I'm sleepy.

I'm doing Strategy Room tomorrow so I need to read up on all the entertainment stories. That's really what I should be doing now. Right now. Also... um... dammit I had something else to say.

Anyone see Grey's Anatomy on Thursday? Gross. And sad. But that wasn't what I was going to say.

Oh yes! I remember. The lovely Anna David made a video where she talked about taking Dr. Drew's narcissism quiz. I scored 13 which was a surprise to me and also a surprise to myself and also to me. I'm wondering how you guys score? I'm also, like Anna, wondering about the accuracy of the test because in many cases you're given two choices and neither feels right. Anyway, I found a link to the quiz here.

Vlog about books and strippers

Endangered words and creepy girls

Gawker put up this post about endangered words and the scary thing is that I frequently use most of the words people are worried about losing and/or saying should be brought back. Why, just the other day I remarked to a friend, "Zounds! I'm headed to a hootenanny where I shall squeeze my guts with a stick! Then I shall tweet about any terrific frippery I encounter after said gut squeezing." Which begs the question: Am I that person out there in the linguistic forest chained to a big tree? Because no one cares about that person. I mean, you don't want them to get chopped down because that's gross, but in general it's like, "you should have thought about that before chaining yourself to a tree." It also begs the question, does anyone chain themselves to trees or is that just a plot device from Family Ties?

It also begs the question if my references are anachronistic in the extreme so pretend instead of Family Ties I'd said One Tree Hill.


The other day Anna and I were talking and I told her a story where I'd worried I'd come off as a creepy goober and she stopped me and said nothing I could have done would be worse than having used the word goober. "But I like goober!" I weedled asthmatically. It was attractive. She relented a bit, perhaps I am more in touch with slang zeitgeist was the thinking, however I've since embargoed goober.

Goober, goober, goober, goober, goober, goober, goober, goober, goober, goober, goober, goober...

Oops, embargo repealed!

So, want to hear the story where I was worried I came off as a creepy goober? I think you do!

I had potential plans to hang out with someone I don't know well however we're both incredibly famous and exceedingly wonderful. He invited me to a thing and I couldn't go to the thing so then maybe we were going to meet up the following day. He texted, "I'll touch base with you tomorrow." I quickly typed into my phone: "Not if I touch your base first." And, here is the thing, I was sitting there staring at my own text thinking, "Don't send this, it's sending a message you aren't intending to send." And then I watched myself hit send, knowing this was quite possibly going to make things weird, because ultimately I was more in love with my dumb wordplay than anything else. Hence the question which I discussed with The 404, can girls be creepy?

"I'm very immature... and I love vlogs!"

Anna and I walked home from a party. Also, I'm a tag slut. Also, my hair was really stuck to my face in a way that wasn't quite captured in this video.

Wherein we try to remember the most interesting conversation EVER!

Anna and I try to remember The Most Interesting Conversation Either Of Us Have Ever Had.

Also, what's up with my voice? I sound like my sister to me in this one, which probably doesn't mean anything to anyone here. Speaking of voices, Anna is losing her voice and so I told her we had to vlog last night to capture her ephemeral husky voice. I don't know if she's looked at the video yet. I'm totally blog baiting her right now. Vlog-baiting?

These photos aren't as dark

Please note the hot Rudolph action happening on my nose and also my cheeks a little bit. I still don't know WHY it happens, but I can feel it happening. "My face is red, isn't it..." I'll say. And then the person I'm talking to will either say it isn't and that I'm imagining it, or they'll say 'um, I guess kind of?' or they'll say 'yes' at which point I know I'm reaching angry tomato levels of ruddiness. Don't be jealous!

My old party trick

Delightfully dark picture of Anna, me and Natali

Brighter photos to come.

Oh and last night Natali got recognized by someone which I didn't think much of because she's all over the place but then it turned out he'd specifically recognized her from Red Eye and upon hearing this—or rather upon Anna telling me this was what was going on—I tried my best to dangle my very memorable and arguably exquisite face in his sight line. I mean, I all but sat in his lap. But Anna Who Could See The Conversation And Make Out What He Was Saying told me that evidently he'd only seen one episode... featuring Natali.

It's cool though because I recognized myself and made a big to-do until finally I had to have one of my handlers tell me to cool it because I was freaking out "the talent," which is how I refer to myself to myself.

About whether to watch the videos here or on Anna's blog

I mean, both, obviously!!

But I bring it up because it's come up in the comments and it's something Anna and I are figuring out as well. If I had my druthers—and sadly I can't remember the last place I saw them, I mean, I know they didn't just walk out of here on their own!!!!!!—we would both post the videos and then you would see them here and there and we'd also put them in your apartment and on your ceiling and in the back of a cab* and one day we would broadcast them straight to the insides of your eyelids. And then we'd GO VIRAL! I'm not even sure what that means but I think it means that fans would shed tiny bits of Anna and my embed code. I'm joking, I know what GO VIRAL means in this sense but I just don't know how to do it. Must we insert a shrimp on a treadmill into our videos? Or a dancing hamster? An erudite gopher? Can you guys help us in our quest for being contagious on an epic scale? We're very blood born. Also, we mutate. Also, don't watch our videos if you have cuts in your mouth. Just kidding! You can totally watch our videos if you have cuts in your mouth! In fact, we insist on it!

So but just wanted to bring this conversation into the open since you're having it in the comments and we're having it in the hot tub where we like to hang out and do our thinking. Have at her!

So, just to round it all up. There is this site which you are well acquainted with. And there's Anna's blog which you also know. And then both of us have youtube pages.

youtube.com/alisonrosen
youtube.com/overannalyze

*not really because let's face it: everyone shuts that shit off the second they slide into a cab.

The Vegemite Sandwich dance

A couple things

1) It had been a really long day
2) Note the way I captured/framed my hair and a tiny little sliver of my face in an entirely new way.
3) TV makeup doing weird things on my skin. As I said to Anna hours before we filmed this "I'm going to leave it on until I'm convinced a layer of my skin is burning off."
4) I mean, not that it burns your skin at all. Just that at a certain point I want it OFF.
5) And yet I'm pretty girly.
6) It's very windy in NYC in case you're wondering.

GO TO Anna's blog to see the video, won't you?

And while you're there, how about leaving some comments? Anna loves comments! If she could make a blanket out of comments she would, except maybe not because her apartment is pretty hot. But you know.

Cats, bunnies, products, fallopian tubes, Anna and me

This started out as a stealth solo vlog but then turned into a discussion of product placement, animals named Tobey and how I failed my pet rabbit.

Calling all nerds: Can you help Anna figure out how to hook up her DVD player?

So last night Anna and I tried to hook up her DVD player but we couldn't figure it out because it's challenging and exists in multiple dimensions such as "things we don't know" and also "plugs and that plug into stuff." It was very vexing! So we're turning to you, hoping one of you can help Anna out. Can you? Watch below for scintillating footage of patch bays which is a term I know from watching my friend record music and which is probably not the correct term but aren't you impressed I even know it and also invigorating discussions of the way I pronounce certain words. Also, not loving my makeup here. Or my face, for that matter.

Anna and I discuss that evil 25 random Facebook things

Curious what the 25 Random Things we're talking about is? Here's is mine:

1. I don't like to wake up on a zero or a five so I set my alarm for weird numbers. I justify this as quirky not neurotic because if I HAD to get up on a zero or five I totally could, so long as I spun around three times to the left while yelling "quark."

2. Ok, so the spinning around and yelling quark part is made up, but the rest is true. Also, I consider myself a terrible liar. Truly.

3. When I was six I wanted to be a therapist.

4. I hate going to Kinko's.

5. Facts of Life is my favorite show. I pride myself on having seen every episode. I enjoy Facts of Life trivia. I realize you're very attracted to me right now.

6. I'm actually pretty shy deep down and can be easily intimidated in social situations. With a camera in my face and a microphone in my hand though, I'm a real extroverted asshole.

7. Does the above sound cliche? I'd rather not be cliche. Also, I'd rather not be invisible so if you recognize me I encourage you to make a big scene. Carry streamers just in case.

8. I went to Pomona College and majored in English. I miss those years. All five of them. (Not really!)

9. I have a younger sister and two older half brothers.

10. After college I played guitar a punk band.

11. I overthink everything. In fact, my California friends dubbed the process of overthinking "Rosenating." Anyone can Rosenate though. I invite you to join in.

12. I have a magic 8 ball on my desk and like to ask it all sorts of questions however I won't ask it anything morbid because I'm sort of superstitious even though deep down I don't believe in any of that.

13. Unrelated, I was raised Quaker.

14. I value humor and self-awareness.

15. I hate the smell of white vinegar.

16. I love the smell of laundry detergent and dryer sheets.

17. I have naturally curly hair which is naturally black. I straighten it but I don't dye it. I used to lighten it. I'm not goth.

18. I moved to New York without a job, shortly after 9/11. Most people thought what I was doing was nuts. I was afraid if I didn't do it I'd blink and be old and still living in Orange County, CA, always wondering what would have happened if I'd had the balls to go to NYC.

19. That said, I miss CA and all my friends who are there and whenever I go back I feel kinda nostalgic for everything I left.

20. I very seldom worry about being both "funny" and "a woman" although maybe I should? I guess deep down I believe that everything will work out. Unless it totally doesn't.

21. I'm not a shitty drummer. I'm kind of a shitty guitar player.

22. There are certain things which make me laugh and which will always make me laugh but which make no one else laugh. My jokes are not one of them though (they're universally regarded as brilliant and hilarious.)

23. In order of cuteness: babies then puppies then ducklings

24. Perhaps it would behoove me to care more about not making a fool of myself.

25. I don't enjoy karaoke or scrabble nearly as much as people assume I would.

Wherein Alison talks too much about bras!

More vlogs!

Here we are, about to leave the office.





Earlier that day I developed a speech impediment

OMG I'm still uploading these

Am I blowing my vlog wad? Is that crude? It is. Anyway, here's another!

Then we almost got lost and Alison rambled even more than usual

Then we talked about stuff. deep stuff!

Day 3: lunch

Please note the hair on the back of my coat