My dream of an outtake reel from the recent MINI shoot is dying on the vine, time constraints being what they are, so I thought I'd just tell you about what would have been on the reel. The reel that you'll never see. Did I mention you won't see it? Because you won't.
1) Me doing a whole demonstration of how quiet the engine is and then ending it by making a joke about how it's "one horsepower." Then me driving away and then driving back into the frame and explaining that I was just joking, it's "normal horsepower." Then me driving away and driving back into the frame and saying to Ben that the damn take would have worked if only I hadn't said that dumb thing about horsepower.
2) Me taking the battery charging plug that you're supposed to plug into the car and plugging it into my hip and then jumping around as if I were getting electrocuted.
3) Me draping myself over the car in a mock provocative way a la car girls at car shows. (Mockvocative?)
4) Me asking Jim if the car emitted patchouli fumes. He said no. (That was in the video). But then I asked him if it emitted marshmallows, butterflies, rainbows or Nagchampa ("it's a kind of incense" I explained)
There was more, but now I have a headache.
Need to book me on your show or tell me how great I am?
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For professional inquiries please CC:
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About Me
- alison
- I am a vivacious person with effervescent thoughts and bubbly feelings, which I used to save for my diary and therapist before realizing I could share them with a million strangers, unless of course we've met before in which case remember that time we were at that place and then I did that thing? Sorry about that... Also I'm a writer, pop culture analyst/expert and regular TV guest. Care to be impressed by my credentials? Well then, from 2005—2008 I did Best Bets with Alison Rosen, a segment on WNBC's Weekend Today in New York show. I've appeared on Montel, Chelsea Lately, Hannity & Colmes, Fox & Friends and a bunch more and I'm a regular commentator on Fox News Channel's Red Eye. I wrote for the Los Angeles Times when I was 18. I'm a former Time Out New York editor. I'm a contributing editor for Page Six Magazine. I've written for a zillion publications including Rolling Stone, Maxim, Spin, People, Village Voice, New York Press, Nerve, Seventeen, Vibe, Seattle Weekly, Minneapolis City Pages, OC Weekly and Page Six Magazine. I used to play guitar in a punk band. I have naturally black hair. I won NY's Funniest Reporter competition.
Go here for so many photos you will be like, Wow, she's just that into herself. OR, click the above image to be taken to a page with every photo ever uploaded to this blog.
4 comments:
Aww...I would've loved to see 2 and 3.
Reply to the directors cut:
"Is there a scene in the mini-clip that parodies WW2 were an English MIni Cooper duals with the German Volkswagon Beattle? I'm guessing it wasn't attempted to begin with because it probably is a predictable
scheme........
"Me draping myself over the car in a mock provocative way a la car girls at car shows"
Alison, my dear, you ARE a car girl at a car show. You may not be wearing a bikini, but you're still just as hot.
But yeah, the BMW/Mini people probably wouldn't appreciate a joke about a one horsepower Mini E. It's more like 204 horsepower. OK, yes, I had to look that up. Geez.. I was hoping you'd just think I was smart.
P.S. I hope you found your Mom.
lovin the videos! ny is missing you but you should not be missing it. it is seriously don't-leave-your-house cold.
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