Thursday, July 10, 2008

this is happening right now

I am in a cab and the cab driver is burping something fierce. Like a continual string of low growly ones. Seriously, sir, what are we dealing with? Is this GERD? Did you drink a small lagoon of pepsi? Is there a tiger in here? Okay, now you are hacking something up and kind of sniffling. Is this consumption? It strikes as consumptive. Okay, the burps have changed pitch. More hollow sounding. I may throw up, you know, just cuz!
Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry

8 comments:

Brett Jones said...

Wasn't that what happened in some horror flix? The alien/monster/infected person was off gassing and leaking fluids then BAM! It ate the unsuspecting passenger in the cab.

Dear God...

If we don't hear from AMR in the morning we'll know something bad happened.

Brett Jones said...

If in fact you did live through this cab ride I have a RE suggestion.

I just watched your latest RE appearance and I noticed you way in the back behind Andy in the wide shots. They should do a little graphic pointing you out whenever you're back there. Something flashy, maybe throbbing. It should on occasion obscure Andy's face.

I was considering a "Nobody puts Alison in the corner" joke, but my heart just wasn't into it.

Anonymous said...

Quote of the Taxi Driver 2 :

"This cabbie post reminds me of the possibility, if INdiana Jones Can do it, why can't I ? You know, to Nuke The Fridge...."

-----Travis "Deniro so old don't you dare think about it" Bickle

Toddrod said...

Woah, that totally sounds like my late grandfather. He used to do these little burps, but he'd follow the burp with little exhale of air. It was like his body didn't want to just burp everything out of his system, so it would do a small burp (a surp), then exhale, then sometimes a sniffle. I miss him and his cute little ways.

Toddrod

Joe said...

Maybe it was the Cash Cab. Did he ask you a lot of trivia questions?

Ben Baily probably burps all the time on the show, but they edit it out for TV.

If I drove a cab in NYC, you better believe I'd be drinking tons of highly caffinated soda every shift. I've ridden in NYC cabs - some of those guys are suicidal.

One time on Cash Cab, Baily said he drives by one NYC building dozens of times a day. I get antsy if I have to drive to the store up the road more than a couple of times a week. And there usually isn't any traffic.

Doesn't it cost something like $600,000 for a taxi license these days? Add in the cost of gas and you have to wonder how those guys make any money.

Rbastid said...

Do you expect any better from the taxi drivers at 2 AM?

I've come to the point I'll risk getting shanked by Bernie Getz on the Subway then sit in a puddle of god knows what in a cab.

Did you offer to burp the driver over your shoulder? I can see you making that remark to him as you leave the cab, then run as fast as you can into your building past the hot neighbor.

Ted from Accounting said...

I've only been in cab rides when I've visited Mexico....

True story:

I'm riding in a cab with friends and the cab driver side swipes another cab going around a turn. They both pull over as if to exchange insurance. Then my cab driver takes off and there is a high speed chase through downtown Tijuana between our two cabs! Fortunately, when my driver lost the other cab, he let us out! That was crazy! I don't recall if he burped though!

----

I should reveal who anonymous is but I won't! I just love her posts!

Toddrod said...

You know who anonymous is? Come on Ted! Don't hold out!

Toddrod (I'm signing my name again)