Tuesday, June 03, 2008

a wrinkle

Update: I now have an A/C unit that's too heavy for me to lift sitting in a box in the middle of my bedroom. It's 72 pounds. The amp I used to use when I played in a band was 80 pounds. I was thinking that while that was heavy, it wasn't impossible for me to move it, but then I didn't ever have to hoist it into a window. But maybe sometimes I had to lift it up onstage? I can't remember now. Probably other people did that for me while I conveniently stole away to the bathroom to fix my glitter (we were a shiny band). I'm an asshole like that.

Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to go buy milk and when I come back I expect this air conditioner to be properly, safely and magically installed.

Note: If I come back to find this air conditioner installed I will breath a sigh of relief and then call the cops. Do you hear me, inanimate objects in my room? I'm talking to you, hair dryer! No funny business, folded towels! Yeah that's right, don't pull any fast ones on me, fingerless mittens. I've got my eyes on all of you.


Brett said...

Call in a big strapping guy who is handy with a tool (even though you're in NYC and I can understand the confusion, I'm not recommending a burly gay guy) to install this thing.

When installing these things you need 3 hands, all of which need to be able to hold a precariously balanced 75lbs box on the windowsill while you screw things together. That and if you don't install it correctly they can fall out of the window. Assuming you're a few stories up it could be rough on a passer by to have it land on their head like a piano in a Popeye cartoon.

If you know no men capable of real work, hire someone.

Anonymous said...

Quote of the Super Tuesday:

" Talking about A/C's, is it hot in here or is it just me ?"

-----H. Clinton

(Note: This blog is either bipartisan or nonpartisan. But either way, we support one thing and one thing only. That is watching street fighter Kimbo Slice one day beat the living shirt out of a shirtless Bill while he's streetwalking in a striped skirt that resembles a KFC bucket with straps on it. )Is the word shirt misspelled with an extra letter by the way?