Friday, June 20, 2008

If I drew cartoons for The New Yorker...

I would draw one of two pieces of clothing on a clothesline. One would be somehow chatting up the other and would be saying, "What do you say we take this off-line?"

But that wouldn't be the end of my clothesline cartoon oeuvre. On the contrary, it'd be just the beginning!

I'd also draw one of some kind of clearly inebriated garment on a clothesline. You know, like a drunk jacket, let's say. Or a wasted t-shirt. Or a pair of blotto bloomers. Or a three sheets to the wind shift dress. Or hammered hemp skirt. Or a borracho sombrero. Or some knackered knickers! Maybe not the sombrero! And the person hanging this drunk garment on the clothesline would be saying "you need to dry out."

But see, this is why I don't draw cartoons for The New Yorker.

Bill Schulz could draw cartoons for The New Yorker if they needed doodles of two pigs in the throes of non-consensual lovemaking. It's his signature doodle and you won't find a better representation of said scene on the Eastern Seaboard.


Rbastid said...

Sadly your cartoons make more sense then the last 2 hours of having to watch Grimm's Fairy Tale Classics. I don't get how this stuff was for kids.

Just make sure you don't rip off a Zigy with your cartoon.

Ted from Accounting said...

Except for that exceptional limited edition AMR drawing that I did a while back, that was the best drawing I could ever do...he he! I lack all artistic talent! :(

I've noticed you've written a lot of sexual connotations in your blog lately....summer must be here!

Have a great weekend!

Toddrod said...

What Ted?!? I haven't seen that. I've seen a lot of other connotations as of late, but none of these sexual ones you have mentioned. Maybe I am missing something. I always seem to be missing something!

Have a great weekend everyone! You too Alison (get some nookie)!


Joe said...

I didn't know what blotto bloomers were, so I Googled it and found out they're, "long loose pants gathered at the ankle and formerly worn by women and girls under a shorter skirt." Ahhhhhhh Soooooo!

You learn something new every day, especially here on Ms. Alison's blog!

Happy summer everyone! Although I don't think it officially arrives until later this evening - I'd have to check Stonehenge to be sure of the exact time.

Rbastid said...


Here in NY we know its finally summer because all the homeless remove their pants in favor of just wearing a garbage bag skirt.

At 7:59PM we'll have the get changing of the seasons outside Madison Square Park.