Sunday, June 08, 2008

The corn lied!

What kind of world is this when even vegetables feel pressure to lie about their age? Here is the front of the can:

Note how it says "Baby Corn." But then you look at the ingredients and it says this:


Now I'm not going to lie. I like my corn young. The younger the better. I'm like the cougar of the canned produce world, so I don't know how to feel about this. Mostly betrayed, I guess.


adrian said...

its hard to be "fancy" when you are a baby. cute? yes. Fancy? not so much. Thus they had to cast someone older for the part.

Joe said...

It's against the law in many states to eat under-age corn. NBC had a whole series called "To Catch a Corn Predator". The worst part is the stalking (get it - corn stalks????)

There's nothing worse than violence perpetrated on young ears of corn. Or any other part of a corn's body I suppose. Why do they call it an "ear" of corn anyway? It looks nothing like an ear.

But your post reminds me of a Red Eye intro that went, "something something something, I'd eat her in the can." I don't think Greg was talking about corn.

alison said...

Are you thinking of "If [whatever] was Vienna Sausages, I'd eat her in the can"? I wrote that one, so I choose to think you were. It's all very ME ME ME inside my head.

Joe said...

Yes, I'm sure that was it. Vienna Sausage sounds very familiar.

There have been so many intros. Every time I think of one to post on The Daily Gut, I'm sure it's been done before. But that's OK, they're still fun.

And actually, Alison, when it comes to the intros, it really is all YOU YOU YOU - you invented them.

Joe said...

By the way, there's a new episode of "To Catch a Corn Predator" this Thursday night. Chris Hansen interviews a guy in Muncie who has been hiding under-age corn in his basement for 15 years. It's so sad. And most of the corn was never even reported missing.