Saturday, March 15, 2008

In the waiting room

I should have brought a book to this waiting area where it looks like I'll be spending my saturday. Instead I brought my blackberry and... Let's check the contents of my pocket, shall we? A receipt, a bandaid, eleven dollars and 48 cents, two packets of equal, two earplugs, a banana and a myna bird.

Now, I know what you're thinking, but the truth is that I just prefer equal to splenda. I find it to be a bit sweeter and it has less of a chemical aftertaste. As for the myna bird, I'm not going to lie, it's somewhat annoying to have to watch what I say all the time for fear of it being parroted back to me. At the same time it's been hugely illuminating to listen to the profound things that come out of his beak, which are obviously things he picked up from me. In bird years, he's probably about 65. Just a really old soul. And so funny. Sometimes he does this thing where he just looks at me and stands still and I'm like, 'yep, he's got my number!' This one time he ate a grape and, well, you just should have seen it. Also, he's kept me from making what would have turned out to be a couple massively unwise real estate investments. I'm not going to lie though, he also told me to sell short when I should have hung on. I was mad, but I wrote out my feelings to him in a letter and I think he really got what I was saying. I felt heard, which is so important.

Actually, he and I have really gotten into it because he thinks it's rude when I read when he's right there so maybe it's better I don't have a book. Still, I wish he'd understand that it's not personal, I just need some time with my thoughts and it doesn't mean my feelings about him have changed.

Uh oh, it appears he's eaten an earplug. Say that again? I can't hear you! Use words! Enunciate please.

Well this is really frustrating. He does it just to annoy me.

Sent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerry


University of Southern California Squirrels said...

What's it like to have a myna bird as a friend?

Do you consider them loyal and "other centered" (other being you, not them) or are they duplicitous and self centered?

Is this kind of question not applicable to myna birds?

Joe said...

A banana? How disappointing. I thought you were happy to see me.

What we know: Alison spent the day in a waiting room/ER with her sister (and sister's boyufriend), where they drew some of her sister's blood and gave her an IV. A nearby cup of urine probably belongs to her. There are many cops around, which might have something to do with a large construction crane collapse.

We also know Alison carrys around some odd items in her pocket, including at least one member of the Passeriforme order.

OK, you have us on the edge of our seats...

We're waiting...

Still waiting...

Pow said...

The waiting room can be horrible. You never know what's going on. A book is always a good idea. Was there a TV? Most of the time they have something stupid on that you find really annoying though. Some other time you might like it, but just not then.
Splenda is nasty. I don't use any sweetener now. When I did I tried it. It was like adding road salt. Ya know, like they put out for ice.