With a Keen Sight: An excerpt by James "The Fact Man " Frey
I read on one of your previous post regarding a "BAWDY Language Segment" that you actually do have 20/20 vision and it was just your usual ruses to look like Tonya Reimanof. But I envy such qualities because when I was diagnosed with Cataracts (which is true), I misread the RX statement and thought I won a free Cadillac ! Also, my doctor noted that "since you are going blind, you might as well eat both your eyes cause I think it has Guacamole in it". (Glaucoma for those who don't get the joke.)But as is the case, my eye sight degenerated to the very worst.So my cousin Rick gave me a DVD to watch to alleviate me of my sorrows from my condition. Even through the nebulous blur, I 'am very positive that I can make out the title of the movie correctly which reads "Gone with the Wind" Vol 4 by Joe Francis. My very loyal Rick laughingly said the remake is in New Orleans rather than Georgia. But I’am sure regardless of the setting, I will enjoy. Cause “Frankly my dear, I don’t really give a damn !!!!
Title: "If a talking robot can have a post in this blog, then a man seeking your darning forgiveness is equally deserving to have one too". {Written By a familiar stranger }.
Dear Alison
The external New York mileu outside of my large Manor is rainy and cloudy underscoring the emotional tone plaguing me since the day we've met. I'm writing this to you while shunning my self from human contact guilty of the irreparable gaffe I've admittedly commited before you as my witness.I'm sorry I overreacted during that interview we had in August during which you've asked a very personal question which inflamed me to retort with an equal but unpleasant question that forced you to answer the very information that should be kept within the cladestine vaults of your soul. During that moment, I'm sure you became disheartened with my deplorable actions that I have to say is not the full definition of my overall character. So to make it up, how about dinner in my house with my best friend Larry Kramer? (Not the Seinfeld Dude but the one who has given me my utmost inspiration.)
Yours trulies, Ed " I love to Cockadoodadoodoo all morning long" Koch
To: Alison "Who makes Rodger Ebert look like an Ebert" Rosen
From: Janet "the Superboob...I mean Superbowl 38 Diva " Jackson (sorry for the error)
Letter: I like to apologize for the above error. I couldn't erase it with my keyboard because you see, after the incident in 2004, the FCC took my BACKSPACE key like how banks can take cars and houses. This is an advisory warning to you Alison because you may blurt something uncouth or offensive during your next Red Eye apearance and the next thing you know it your F1,F2,ALT,or that "HURRY UP CUZ MOM IS COMING AND SHE'S ABOUT TO CATCH YOU WATCHIN' SOMETHIN' YOU AIN"T SUPPOSED TO BE WATCHIN' SO HIT IT NOW DAMMIT NOW" button may disappear in an instant leaving your HP keyboard{I'm psychic, I know you use an HP Alison.)looking like pirates with missing teeth. Take my advise and you will guarantee your keyboard's safety. Also, there's one thing I want to ask you personally. WHAT THE HELLS IS MY BROTHER MICHEAL DOING IN LOUISIANA WITHOUT TELLING ME A SINGLE WORD ABOUT IT AND BLITHELY BLOGGING IN THE SAME BLOG I'M BLOGGING IN!!!???
This doesn't really involve body language, but I thought I would tell you anyway. I was listening to the Gregalogue from Oct. 22 and I thought I heard something strange. I reversed it, and while it was going backwards I clearly heard someone say "Dat Ho is dead. Poor Dat Ho". I know it's hard to believe, but it was definitely there. So I started listening to other segments in reverse. On Andy's half time report the very next night, I heard someone say, "I buried Dat Ho."
Then on the segment Bill did for the dog show toward the end when Bill is on the dog leash, I found something else. If you slow it down quite a bit you can hear, "Turn me on, house boy". I think even the image of Bill ON A LEASH may be an important clue here.
I'll leave it to you to investigate further, but please be careful. For my part, I'm sleeping with one eye open this weekend!
T-minus 45 min till the O.C. The Soap Channel is the best thing since sliced bread. Nothing better than watching Two back to back episodes daily of DALLAS. J.R is the man. He's the best villain ever invented. This may explain some flaws in my personality, but who cares. It's good to be me. Anyhoo, very disturbing again to see Andy try to Boy-handle a sophisticated person as Alison. Have a great weekend Alison! I'm audi.
One more before the O.C. comes on. I would just like to point out that it seems as if people from the south make better presidents. That must prove that we're not just a bunch of red-necks down here. For example. Jimmy Carter,George Bush sr.,Bill Clinton,and George Bush jr. Just to name a few. Southerners have proved that we have the right way of thinking as far as leadership qualities. I'm sure we're gonna be able to add Hillary Clinton next. Although I support Mike Huckabee. So some may want to rethink how they view southern people. After all, we have dominated the presidency for quite sometime. And too, the rappers from the south are better too. Word!
Michael. "The John McEnroe of the internet." Louisiana. although I was born in Dallas. Go Cowboys!
Ahh, another fine episode of the O.C. I had quit watching it back when they changed the time slot to go up against C.S.I. Just goes to show their is balance in the universe. Later days!
I am ecstatic, Ann Coulter on tonight. This time I hope she stays the whole hour. Now that she got her feet wet from the last show, I hope she comes with her guns loaded. (figuratively speaking of course.) Ann Coulter is the sexiest political figure there is,right behind her is Dana Perino.That would be a fantastic 3-way, if only I wasn't so intimidated by them. They would probably make me be the woman. I'm not so sure I'm THAT in touch with my feminine side.
There are truly hilarious comments people work hard making but they don't seem to be posted in this blog. And I consider myself one of them. Many of those who try to get their jokes out but get shunned frequently are one of your many fans who are into reading what you have to say. Without these fans, this blog would be nothing but a desolate wasteland. Through a series of getting my messages rejected, messages that contain a lack of vulgarity and obscenity that is, despite of all of that, I continue to at least share the comical talent I have deep inside hoping your other bloggers and you can read to join in laughter. But since this rebuff has been going on for quite sometime, I decide to make this as my last note to you as an estimation to what your blog really is. I'am very disappointed to consider it unduly in partiality while favoring only some of your frequent readers while rejecting others who are just as loyal or perhaps much more devoted.
Hey just a note to say that I appreciate everyone reading this blog and I appreciate all the comments! I really do! The quickest way to get your comment posted is to not be anonymous. Beyond that it's a matter of time and I'm sorry if it appears that I'm favoring certain comments because that's not the case!
As a frequent guest on this blog. I also find that some of my posts are not posted. I just assume that I probably said things that aren't appropriate. I just take it in stride and try to do better the next time. I think this blog is very well managed and maintained. It's what keeps me coming back. Personally, I never take anything personal on the internet. It's all for entertainment. I choose to log in anonymous cause it's less tedius. I do however post my name and where I reside. One of the great perks of this site is that Alison interacts with us whenever she can. We all obviously know she is a very busy person. I enjoy other people's posts on here. It's very entertaining. Anyway, I have babbled long enough. In closing, thank you Alison for letting us have the privelege to post here.
I am a vivacious person with effervescent thoughts and bubbly feelings, which I used to save for my diary and therapist before realizing I could share them with a million strangers, unless of course we've met before in which case remember that time we were at that place and then I did that thing? Sorry about that... Also I'm a writer, pop culture analyst/expert and regular TV guest. Care to be impressed by my credentials? Well then, from 2005—2008 I did Best Bets with Alison Rosen, a segment on WNBC's Weekend Today in New York show. I've appeared on Montel, Chelsea Lately, Hannity & Colmes, Fox & Friends and a bunch more and I'm a regular commentator on Fox News Channel's Red Eye. I wrote for the Los Angeles Times when I was 18. I'm a former Time Out New York editor. I'm a contributing editor for Page Six Magazine. I've written for a zillion publications including Rolling Stone, Maxim, Spin, People, Village Voice, New York Press, Nerve, Seventeen, Vibe, Seattle Weekly, Minneapolis City Pages, OC Weekly and Page Six Magazine. I used to play guitar in a punk band. I have naturally black hair. I won NY's Funniest Reporter competition.
15 comments:
Good stuff again as always. See ya next time.
Levy is an anagram for EVYL.
With a Keen Sight: An excerpt by James "The Fact Man " Frey
I read on one of your previous post regarding a "BAWDY Language Segment" that you actually do have 20/20 vision and it was just your usual ruses to look like Tonya Reimanof. But I envy such qualities because when I was diagnosed with Cataracts (which is true), I misread the RX statement and thought I won a free Cadillac ! Also, my doctor noted that "since you are going blind, you might as well eat both your eyes cause I think it has Guacamole in it". (Glaucoma for those who don't get the joke.)But as is the case, my eye sight degenerated to the very worst.So my cousin Rick gave me a DVD to watch to alleviate me of my sorrows from my condition. Even through the nebulous blur, I 'am very positive that I can make out the title of the movie correctly which reads "Gone with the Wind" Vol 4 by Joe Francis. My very loyal Rick laughingly said the remake is in New Orleans rather than Georgia. But I’am sure regardless of the setting, I will enjoy. Cause “Frankly my dear, I don’t really give a damn !!!!
Title: "If a talking robot can have a post in this blog, then a man seeking your darning forgiveness is equally deserving to have one too". {Written By a familiar stranger }.
Dear Alison
The external New York mileu outside of my large Manor is rainy and cloudy underscoring the emotional tone plaguing me since the day we've met. I'm writing this to you while shunning my self from human contact guilty of the irreparable gaffe I've admittedly commited before you as my witness.I'm sorry I overreacted during that interview we had in August during which you've asked a very personal question which inflamed me to retort with an equal but unpleasant question that forced you to answer the very information that should be kept within the cladestine vaults of your soul. During that moment, I'm sure you became disheartened with my deplorable actions that I have to say is not the full definition of my overall character. So to make it up, how about dinner in my house with my best friend Larry Kramer? (Not the Seinfeld Dude but the one who has given me my utmost inspiration.)
Yours trulies, Ed " I love to Cockadoodadoodoo all morning long" Koch
To: Alison "Who makes Rodger Ebert look like an Ebert" Rosen
From: Janet "the Superboob...I mean Superbowl 38 Diva " Jackson (sorry for the error)
Letter:
I like to apologize for the above error. I couldn't erase it with my keyboard because you see, after the incident in 2004, the FCC took my BACKSPACE key like how banks can take cars and houses. This is an advisory warning to you Alison because you may blurt something uncouth or offensive during your next Red Eye apearance and the next thing you know it your F1,F2,ALT,or that "HURRY UP CUZ MOM IS COMING AND SHE'S ABOUT TO CATCH YOU WATCHIN' SOMETHIN' YOU AIN"T SUPPOSED TO BE WATCHIN' SO HIT IT NOW DAMMIT NOW" button may disappear in an instant leaving your HP keyboard{I'm psychic, I know you use an HP Alison.)looking like pirates with missing teeth. Take my advise and you will guarantee your keyboard's safety. Also, there's one thing I want to ask you personally. WHAT THE HELLS IS MY BROTHER MICHEAL DOING IN LOUISIANA WITHOUT TELLING ME A SINGLE WORD ABOUT IT AND BLITHELY BLOGGING IN THE SAME BLOG I'M BLOGGING IN!!!???
That was a funny segment Alison.
This doesn't really involve body language, but I thought I would tell you anyway. I was listening to the Gregalogue from Oct. 22 and I thought I heard something strange. I reversed it, and while it was going backwards I clearly heard someone say "Dat Ho is dead. Poor Dat Ho". I know it's hard to believe, but it was definitely there. So I started listening to other segments in reverse. On Andy's half time report the very next night, I heard someone say, "I buried Dat Ho."
Then on the segment Bill did for the dog show toward the end when Bill is on the dog leash, I found something else. If you slow it down quite a bit you can hear, "Turn me on, house boy". I think even the image of Bill ON A LEASH may be an important clue here.
I'll leave it to you to investigate further, but please be careful. For my part, I'm sleeping with one eye open this weekend!
T-minus 45 min till the O.C. The Soap Channel is the best thing since sliced bread. Nothing better than watching Two back to back episodes daily of DALLAS. J.R is the man. He's the best villain ever invented. This may explain some flaws in my personality, but who cares. It's good to be me. Anyhoo, very disturbing again to see Andy try to Boy-handle a sophisticated person as Alison. Have a great weekend Alison! I'm audi.
Michael. "The Dennis Rodman of the Net."
Louisiana.
One more before the O.C. comes on.
I would just like to point out that it seems as if people from the south make better presidents. That must prove that we're not just a bunch of red-necks down here. For example. Jimmy Carter,George Bush sr.,Bill Clinton,and George Bush jr. Just to name a few. Southerners have proved that we have the right way of thinking as far as leadership qualities. I'm sure we're gonna be able to add Hillary Clinton next. Although I support Mike Huckabee. So some may want to rethink how they view southern people. After all, we have dominated the presidency for quite sometime. And too, the rappers from the south are better too. Word!
Michael. "The John McEnroe of the internet."
Louisiana. although I was born in Dallas. Go Cowboys!
Ahh, another fine episode of the O.C. I had quit watching it back when they changed the time slot to go up against C.S.I. Just goes to show their is balance in the universe. Later days!
Michael. "just plain ole'me."
Louisiana.
I am ecstatic, Ann Coulter on tonight. This time I hope she stays the whole hour. Now that she got her feet wet from the last show, I hope she comes with her guns loaded. (figuratively speaking of course.) Ann Coulter is the sexiest political figure there is,right behind her is Dana Perino.That would be a fantastic 3-way, if only I wasn't so intimidated by them. They would probably make me be the woman. I'm not so sure I'm THAT in touch with my feminine side.
Michael.
Louisiana.
Question:
There are truly hilarious comments people work hard making but they don't seem to be posted in this blog. And I consider myself one of them. Many of those who try to get their jokes out but get shunned frequently are one of your many fans who are into reading what you have to say. Without these fans, this blog would be nothing but a desolate wasteland. Through a series of getting my messages rejected, messages that contain a lack of vulgarity and obscenity that is, despite of all of that, I continue to at least share the comical talent I have deep inside hoping your other bloggers and you can read to join in laughter. But since this rebuff has been going on for quite sometime, I decide to make this as my last note to you as an estimation to what your blog really is. I'am very disappointed to consider it unduly in partiality while favoring only some of your frequent readers while rejecting others who are just as loyal or perhaps much more devoted.
Hey just a note to say that I appreciate everyone reading this blog and I appreciate all the comments! I really do! The quickest way to get your comment posted is to not be anonymous. Beyond that it's a matter of time and I'm sorry if it appears that I'm favoring certain comments because that's not the case!
As a frequent guest on this blog. I also find that some of my posts are not posted. I just assume that I probably said things that aren't appropriate. I just take it in stride and try to do better the next time. I think this blog is very well managed and maintained. It's what keeps me coming back. Personally, I never take anything personal on the internet. It's all for entertainment. I choose to log in anonymous cause it's less tedius. I do however post my name and where I reside. One of the great perks of this site is that Alison interacts with us whenever she can. We all obviously know she is a very busy person. I enjoy other people's posts on here. It's very entertaining. Anyway, I have babbled long enough. In closing, thank you Alison for letting us have the privelege to post here.
And that's my gut feeling.
Michael.
Louisiana.
Michael saying things that are inappropriate... shocking that.
How did you get information on
Thomas Kinkade because I too have to admit that I have a calender of his paintings?
Jake, Texas
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