Thursday, April 17, 2008

Survival

So I was reading about how to drive in snowy/icy conditions and then I clicked on "what to do if you get stranded" because I was curious and in addition to building a tree fort with discarded mittens you're advised to "suck on a hard candy to keep your mouth moist." So then I was thinking, how do they know you have hard candy with you on your snowy/icy drive? I'm packing right now—attempting carry-on, I might add, which is rare for me since my hairdryer alone barely fits in the overhead bin (it's one of those old fashioned over-the-head inverted colander looking things that comes with its own reclining seat—okay not really, but you know—and I'm not planning on packing hard candy, or even soft candy. Nor flares or a shovel. Basically, I'm fairly fucked if I get stranded except I'll have my blackberry and it's not like I'm going to get stranded anyway. So then I scrolled up though and it mentioned things you should have in your emergency survival kit and it talked about non-perishables like dried fruits in case you need to celebrate passover seder in your car (is dried fruit part of seder? see, I know less than I bet you think I know but that's a topic for another blog). My point is that it didn't list hard candy. But back to my blackberry. While in California a friend said, "Is that a corporate blackberry?" and I said "no, it's a private blackberry" which then struck us as a great porn or stripper name: Private BlackBerry.

And thankfully I'm not sick as I was worried I might be in last night's post, but I'm not quite well either, so I'm still worried.

And I still owe you all a riveting story about yesterday's street kerfuffle, but for now, there is folding that must be done. And button-sewing, which isn't one of my strengths, not even by a long shot. In fact, I may be so bad at button-sewing that it might be crucial that I marry someone who counts it among his skills or else my future family will have to wear only zippers and snaps.

4 comments:

Ted from Accounting said...

It's in my skill set...totally in my skill set! Button sewing was one of the most useful things I picked up in combat! Does this mean, I can be a backup to your backup?

Anonymous said...

Procrastinator! Heal thy self! (yep, I'm still waiting to hear about the street jerk)

Toddrod

Joe said...

Alison, I think that was your funniest post yet. Maybe because I've lived in Vermont for a long time and in N. Dakota for 3 years where the winters are absolutely brutal.

Honestly? I don't remember anyone EVER talking about packing hard candy in the winter. (I'm laghing as I write this, imagining some people off the road in a big snowdrift, at night, in freezing temperatures, and someone saying. "It's OK - I've got some hard candy!!")

I doubt you'll have any trouble with snow. The impression I get about Sun Valley is that it's a lot like Stowe here in Vermont, and Stowe probably has one of the highest concentrations of snow removal equipment in the country.

There's only one main road through the town of Stowe and out to the ski resorts, and the times I've been there in the winter it was immaculate. And all the side roads were kept in good shape too. There are tons of tourists visiting in the winter, and they can't afford to have people getting stranded. There wouldn't be nearly enough hard candy to go around.

:o)

Anonymous said...

Out of all that information, I'm lol'n, well maybe not ol, but I thought the stripper name you and your friend came up with was funny and clever at the same time. Okay, I have to apologize here, that was a very novice comment I just gave. But hey, I can live with it.

Michael.
La.